God is in the Rain (Roger/Mimi) *Casual!*

[ROGER DAVIS]

He was sure it wasn't in his best interest to be outside when the clouds rolled violently overhead. It hadn't released a drop of rain yet, but the lightening bolted in the distance, and Roger counted one, two and then jerked slightly as a loud crashing boom hit his ears.

Two miles away, Roger, his father had once told him. The few times he remembered being happy with his father had been those times, when they had sat in the backyard under the clouds and counted. One, two, three and it had sounded, smashing through the neighbourhood, and Roger had been young, so he remembered clenching onto his father's shoulder, burying his face into the crook of his neck, only peering out when his father had laughed and told him it's okay, kiddo. it's just thunder. it's just god playing a bad note on a guitar.

He remembered a time where April used to dance out on the fire escape in the rain. The violent wind and the rain and Roger would be poking his head out of the Loft, telling her to get inside. She'd smile and twirl on her toes and tell her she could feel God in the rain. Then, April had died and the rain had poured on her funeral.

He remembered meeting Mimi and how the day after the protest, when they were huddled and wrapped in each other in bed, he kissed her and pressed himself against her tightly, burying his head into the crook of her neck as the thunder sounded around them, the sound drowning out the sounds of their screams.

The rain always came with his feelings. Maybe God knew he needed to wash away whatever was bothering him. Maybe April was constantly crying. Maybe God knew that even the simple aspect of rain meant that you were alive. April said she felt God in the rain. He wasn't sure if he believed in God anymore, but he felt Life in the rain. He felt love. He felt pain and heartache and the swelling strings of inaudible music whenever he thought of Mimi.

A drop of rain fell, hitting him straight in the middle of the head, and he jerked slightly out of his thoughts. Another drop followed, followed by another and another until the water was raining down on him. It probably was horrible for his health, but for a simple moment, he spread his arms out as he lay against the tar-covered roof of the Loft's building and simply smiled.

He wasn't sure how long he had laid there, but his skin was wet and his clothes were damp. The rain was starting to fall harder, getting worse as he jerked up, rushing towards the stairwell. Thunder cracked in the distance.

He entered the apartment that he and Mimi shared silently. She had been asleep when he had left, and given that it was somewhere around 3 in the morning, he figured she'd still be asleep. He stripped from his wet clothes, letting them fall in a pile before he slid on a pair of sweatpants before he moved, sliding into the bed next to her.

He sighed out contently, wrapping his arms around her, shivering slightly from the cold. Thunder clapped again in the distance, louder this time, and he buried his face into the crook of her neck, trying to suck the warmth from her body and transfer it to his own. He felt her shift, and he wasn't sure if she was awake or not.

"Go back to sleep, baby."

[mimimarquez]

Rain.

Rain always reminded Mimi of cleansing. It was nature's shower, maybe even God's way of saying that there was always a new beginning to start on, always a new journey to take. When Roger left, Mimi stirred from her sleep and sat up,her hair shifting around as her bleary brown eyes shakily focusing on the apartment around her. Roger was gone, and for a moment, Mimi panicked. What if he'd left her, what if he was tired of...whatifwhatifwhatif.... Mimi took a breath and calmed herself down. No, he hadn't left her.

Getting up from the bed, she finally actually heard the pounding of rain on the roof, and it provided a slight soundtrack to her walk to the window and she sat down, her sweatpants and tanktop not providing much heat as she sat in the loft's windowsill, simply thinking.

She thought about Angel. About how she'd always been so kind, so accepting of everyone and anyone's differences. Then about the friends she'd stayed with before finding this building and what would eventually become the people she would call a family. She sighed, listening to the rain for a moment before going back to bed, snuggling into the covers again, the warmth rewrapping itself after a while.

She wasn't sure how long she'd been laying there, on the edge of conciousness, that place where your darkest dreams and harshest or nicest thoughts made their way to the forefront of your mind, before Roger came in, but she continued to lay there, mind too busy to make her body sit up. Mimi listened to him change, a sense of anticipation welling up inside her, the feeling flying when he laid down next to her. "Go back to sleep, baby." his voice whispered to her when she finaly did make her body move, one of her small hands tangling into Roger's hair.

"Why's your hair wet?" she asked, groggy voice slurring in the darkness.

[ROGER DAVIS]

At one time, he had thought he had it all. He didn't realise, at the time, that his entire relationship with April Ericcson was a big, giant three-way with a chick called Heroin. She had been the argument starter between them. The reason they yelled and hit and scratched each other. It had also been the reason they came together, put aside their differences to bond over the major thing that they both agreed on.

She had also been the reason why April was in the ground. Or at least, part of it. But, the strange thing is that Roger had finally said no, had finally walked away even though the calls had been so sweet. And then, he had met Mimi. Mimi had been under the same thrall that he had once been, that so many people seemed to be. And once again, he was in a threeway relationship. Or a fourway if you counted Benny. And that had caused a rift in their relationship. The drugs and Benny both. But Roger had stayed with her, held her hair and held her body as she screamed and shook and cried against him and told her that he knew.

He understood. It hurt, he knew, he whispered to her over and over again. He smoothed her hair back over and over again and told her that she needed to be strong. He loved her. He was proud of her. She could do this.

Then, for a while, they had been fine. Then there was drugs again. There was Angel and stress and instead of joining her, slamming the same needle and passing out in each others arms....he left.

That year had been the hardest it had ever been; Sante Fe was hot and dry. It was so far away from everything he had ever known. And he had came back, only to find her near death. By some miracle, she had awoken, and things were starting to get better. He hoped, at least. Because he wasn't sure if he could do it again. He wasn't sure if he could deal with the withdrawals and the fighting and the screaming.

He knew he only had a few broken pieces of his heart left. And if she had broken them again...

Her hands shifted through his hair, and for a brief moment, he stood, murmuring out a sound of contentment before he realised that she had spoke. "I was out in the rain." he murmured, wrapping his arms tighter around her. "I couldn't sleep." He placed a slow kiss on her neck, snuggling into her, slipping a leg between hers to try to get as close to her as he could to try to warm up.

[mimimarquez]

Mimi forced her body up with a grunt, sitting up on her elbows, her dark hair shifting, dropping down from her shoulders. "Out in the rain?" she repeated, the things her mind had brought up fading back into the recesses of her mind. She found herself thinking about Roger, thinking about everything about him, about how he chewed on a pencil when he got stuck on a lyric or how his hair shifted when he moved.

"I never heard of anything like that before....you couldn't sleep, so you went out to the rain, which is probably cold and cold usually wakes people up, to help you go to sleep?" she asked, letting herself drop back down onto the bed, snuggling into it's softness. They might not have much, but a comfortable bed and a nice apartment, no matter if it didn't have heat sometimes and didn't always have electricity, they still had each other.

And to MImi, that was enough. It was had been, even when it had just been her and her mother. They maybe sometimes didn't have water or food, but they always had each other. A warm, spinning sensation had taken flight in her chest, spreading to the very tips of her fingertips. She let her eyes slip close, the last remanants of the eyeshadow from that day throwing off little sparkles of glitter.

God, what kind of a cheeseball had she turned into?

[ROGER DAVIS]

"I couldn't sleep." Roger repeated when she spoke, nodding slightly. "So I went out in the rain. Actually, it wasn't raining when I first stepped out there." he told her as she sat up, but when she dropped back onto the bed, Roger propped up on an elbow next to her.

"Well, here's my reasoning. I was out in the rain. I get cold, come back here. I snuggle up with you to get warm...snuggling could possibly lead to sex, and sex makes me tired." he explained, trying to keep his face as serious as possible, but the smile slowly slipped onto his face. "Actually, I'll correct myself. Sex with you leaves me in a coma."

She closed her eyes, and he swallowed, looking down at her with a smile. He brought his other hand up, swiping at the top of her eyelids to try to get the glitter off of them. Though, he had come to the conclusion that the glitter was a permanent part of Mimi.

"You know, I know I'm probably going to sound all cheeseball and disgustingly sweet, but you look really beautiful right now." There was a side that Mimi showed at the Club, what all of the other men saw, and then there was the side that he saw. The one that no man ever saw. The way she looked now. The way she looked as she kissed him, when he was making her moan. Leaning over, he pressed a kiss against her forehead, smiling against her forehead.

"Oh, and just so you know, this isn't me trying to get boyfriend points or kiss your ass or anything. Unless you want me to kiss your ass. Then I totally will."

[mimimarquez]

"Kissin' ass is always welcome." Mimi said, a smile on her voice though her voice was slightly hoarse. She snuggled up in his arms a little, feeling safe there, like she was wrapped in iron- albeit, soft and snuggly iron.

Mimi loved Roger. He was everything to her, and everything she could ever hope to be. She wished she could be so strong. She wished she knew how to provide the same comfort he gave her, but the only comfort she knew how to provide was the kind her mother had shown, and eventually, if she went by that, the care factor ran out after too many fuck-ups.

"Roger...you'd never leave me." she said this not as a question, but a statement of fact. Something that was definate, and she knew it. Well, she hoped she knew it. There were times when she was afraid, afraid that she'd fall back to how she'd been. In Mimi's mind, the man holding her was too strong to ever fall back to his old ways. But her? Nah, she may present a badass attitude to the world, but she knew somewhere in the back of her mind that there was always a chance for failure, for her to fail at being rehabilitated.

Mimi let out a slightly dark laugh at herself. Failing at rehabiltation. She would be the one out of them to do that, wouldn't she?

[ROGER DAVIS]

"Then consider it kissed." Roger stated, though the smile on his face widened when she snuggled into his arms. He lifted his arm slightly for her to snuggle in closer and turned his head to kiss the top of hers.

Roger...you'd never leave me.

Sante Fe seemed to be a distant memory, but every once in a while, it brought itself back to the forefront of his mind. The way they had screamed at each other before he had left. How he hadn't cried until he had hit the LEAVING NEW YORK sign and how he had drove for 24 hours straight, completely and utterly numb. Sante Fe had been a dusty, dead-like place that had made Roger completely and utterly homesick. He had cried himself to sleep seemingly ever night, missing the simple feeling of her arms. He had drove into the desert and screamed at the top of his lungs until he was horse.

And then, he had came back only to find Mimi near death. He couldn't even describe to her if she asked how much his heart had broken when he had watched her eyes close, how her chest and stilled and how for that one, brief second, he had thought she had been dead.

He tightened his hold around her as the thoughts ran through his head, and he scooted down slightly so their faces were level to each other. Bringing up a hand, he pressed it to her cheek, thumb rubbing softly. His hand moved down, lacing their fingers together and he brought their hands up, holding it tightly. "I...will never leave you again." he told her surely, his voice soft against the silence of the room. He leaned forward slightly, pressing his lips against her forehead. "I love you. You've got this...thing over me. You've got this spell over me and I physically ache when I'm not around you."

"I'll never leave you again, baby. Never." he moved, wrapping his arms around her, holding her tightly in his arms. "You are stuck with me forever, lucky you."

[mimimarquez]

Mimi took in a soft breath as Roger spoke. Everything seemed to fall into place in that moment, and she smiled at the kiss on her forehead. "Damn. Well, if I'm stuck with you you might as well be useful." she said, before putting her lips ontop of his, in a light, passionate kiss.

When she pulled away, Mimi looked into his eyes and smiled, then softly began to sing, sitting up in a semi-sitting position.

"You know that I'm a crazy bitch
I do what I want, when I feel like it
All I wanna do is lose control.."

Smile still on her face, she threw her hands up as the next words left her mouth. A happy elation spread through her chest as she sang, giggling a little.

"Ya go with it, go with it, go with it
'Cause you're fuckin' crazy
Rock n' roll

And you're why I smile
It's been a while
Since everyday and everything has felt this right
And now
You turn it all around
And suddenly you're all I need
The reason why,
I smile!"

She bent down and gave her lover another kiss, this one longer and more passionate. Mimi wanted to show Roger that she would gladly return every word he'd just offered her, every promise. The same one she'd seen in his eyes all that time ago when he'd sang to her as she was dying on that table.

[ROGER DAVIS]

Damn. Well, if I'm stuck with you, you might as well be useful.

A breath escaped his lips in a chuckle as he laced his fingers through hers. "I'll try my best to be useful." he told her, though as she leaned down, pressing her lips against his. It was a strange sensation, one that always happened in his stomach and chest every time she kissed him. His heart swelled and stomach flipped. It was a sensation that he had thought once thought was dead and gone.

It was once upon a time where he had thought that he'd die alone, just like April had, and yet, as Mimi sang up and started to sing, Roger knew that he'd be with her as long as he could. He'd kiss her every second of every day if he'd let her, for the thousands of times that he missed while in Sante Fe.

A laugh bubbled out of his lips as she bent down, kissing him soundly. Arms wound around her neck, he pulled her to him, burying his face into her neck. "I love you."

Of course he had said it before, but at one time, the three words had been a phrase that, as Mimi had rightly said, he had been afraid of saying. He had been afraid of letting someone in again. Afraid of lighting that spark and letting it consume him because, even now, he still wondered if there was nothing left but an old, dry shell. Mimi was the tinder that had set his body alight and kept it burning. "I love you."" he said again, wanting to make sure she heard it, that she'd always hear it. He pulled back, taking her head in his hands.

It didn't matter that April was dead or that he was a ghost walking around in a man's body, or the fact that he was completely and utterly mentally unstable; Mimi loved him as a whole. She loved the outside (and she loved it good Roger thought, amused) and she loved the in. The broken, shattered peices of him, she held in her arms with gentle love and care and made sure that she protected them. The question he had been thinking was then spoken aloud.

"How do you do it?"

[mimimarquez]

Mimi's heart clenched at the words, and, wrapping her arms around Roger just as he pulled her head to him and repeated it, she breathed out an exhale. "I love you too." she said, and for a while, sat there, just thinking as Roger held her.

There were so many things that people didn't love about Mimi. Her job, unless you were a customer, people oftentimes also didn't seem to like her outspokeness--that was the thing about Mimi, there wasn't such a thing as liking her or kind've liking her, you either liked her or you didn't. But that only applied to the world outside Mimi and Roger's own little one---Roger was the only one who truly loved her. When Mimi thought about it, that's how it truly was--everything else that didn't deal with Roger was like a totally different world, like watching a movie. But when she was with Roger, everything felt complete. Safe. Whole.

Mimi's arms wrapped a little tighter around him, and she turned her head up. "How do I do what?" she asked, kissing his neck.

((OOC: I'm sorry this is so short! I've finally gotten less busy and I'm finally able to be on longer. Next one'll be alot better!))

[ROGER DAVIS]

There wasn't a way to describe it. At least not in any certain, straight-forward terms. He could tell her that when she smiled, he felt this glow spread through his body, warming every inch of him. When she cried, he felt every single inch of him crack and break and tear until it physically felt so uncomfortable that he had to do everything in his power to stop it, just to stop the pain in himself. He could tell her that she was the most beautiful person that he had ever saw, and how she had brought music back into his soul.

He could tell her all of this and more, and it would still only chip the surface of the iceburg underneath. He brought a hand up, tracing his fingers across the curves of her thin cheekbones, across her eyelids. When she spoke, he watched as she turned up her head to look at him.

"You've--" he started, and then tilted his head slightly. "You've brought me back from death." Of course, it would be corny to say that she had done just that, but it was truth. What Mimi probably hadn't realised was how close Roger had been to death. Sure, he had stuck around, lived in the Loft, but it hadn't been living. It hadn't even been surviving, it had been...floating. A misguided ghost that in the end, would have simply faded away. When she kissed his neck, he shivered, fingers tightening around the strands of her hair as he felt a breath suck sharp into his chest.

"If I hadn't met you that night, I don't think I would have lived out to the New Year."

The words were said almost out of no where, but it had been something that he had been thinking about for a long time. A thought that had plagued his mind more than he had wanted to admit. If he hadn't had met Mimi that night, if he hadn't kissed her in the back alleys of the Life Cafe, he probably would have died before the new year. A week later, and he would have been died.

A breath escaped his lips, and he brought a hand up, pressing his palms against her cheeks, pressing a kiss against her cheek. "How do you make me feel so alive?" he whispered against her cheek. "Every time I'm with you I feel a little piece of me fall back into place. That hole that I had after April--" he felt himself swallow, shaking his head lightly against her. "I thought I'd be alone. And then you showed up. Broke me down. Forced me to see what life was..."