Not Exactly a Chance Meeting (Siobhan)

[SIOBHAN "NYX" SHAW]

Siobhan was surprised when Erik frowned at her comment. So far, she’d seen a lot of emotions from him. He’d been shy, worried, nervous, pleased, bashful, and now she was seeing him looking a bit between confused and surprised. It was an interesting spectrum of emotions – something that she didn’t often see from people in her booth. She wasn’t opposed to it, but she wasn’t quite sure how to handle it. He wasn’t her friend, they didn’t have a relationship. He was a guest and she couldn’t be as personable and caring as she was with her friends and family. It was a hard fence to sit on for her. But it was something that she had to do.

"I...I ...don't mean that I would not...be ...good at performing. I just mean...I just...mean that I ... don't care to ... perform....that's all it is. I don't care to do it. I didn't mean that about no confidence. That's not it. I ...well... that's not it. I could do it if I put my mind to it..."

Siobhan took in the man’s words as well as how he was saying them. She wasn’t sure that he could manage to get up in front of people and perform if he was this nervous around here in a closed room. After all, she did know her Shakespeare – he doth protest too much. But on the other side of the coin, she knew people who got instruments in front of them and became different people. Perhaps it could be the same for him. So she wisely kept her mouth closed, knowing that there was nothing she could say then that would be productive in any way. She’d lived with both Nick and Jamie for long enough to know exactly what shut people down fast, and that was a train of thought that would shut Erik down like a jack rabbit.

Instead, she focused on his answer to her last question.
"It's hard to say, but most likely, I would say my classical compositions. I've sold a few of them..."

“That’s very interesting, Erik. I’m sure that there’s a wide range of collectors for classical pieces,” she replied, her polite smile in place as she shuffled some papers, looking over her notes for a brief moment. “I’m very glad that we took a moment to talk. I feel as if I know you much better now.”

Which was true. He wasn’t a random stranger through her door anymore and she could honestly improvise questions if she had the need to. That was one thing she had learned about this business – timing was everything, and when that timing was off, you needed to be able to fill it convincingly or you’d lose your audience.

“I think I have more than enough for the interview to begin on the air,” she informed him, giving him a more genuine smile than the one before it. “How about you? Are you ready to do this for real?”

If he wasn’t, she’d take a few more minutes, but if he was, she really had to get him on the air. As it was, they were nearly at the top of the hour and when the hour hit, they’d have to begin or cancel the whole thing. She could manage that. She’d done it before with less, after all.

[ERIK DANIEL LENOIR]

Siobhan was looking over her notes. She was very nice, but also very professional. He hadn't been able to break down that professionalism and then on top of it she had thrown him a few questions that were impossible to answer and difficult and they made him uneasy and upset. Damn! Why had he ever thought this was a good idea? In front of an unseen audience, how could either of them get to know each other?

He did, thought, still think it odd that Siobhan had not seemed to have made the connection between his Erik Lenoir persona here and his Danny from Manhattan persona on the radio call-in show. He had thought it would be obvious with his accent and his quite distinctive voice. But of course on the radio it might sound different. And it was quite all right that she hadn't noticed...it could be a bit embarrassing if she had.

And that came to the point of all this for Erik. He had wanted a date and it wasn't going to happen. It rather took the interest out of this whole venture for him. But of course he might as well go through with it. It could drum up a bit of business for him. Not that he particularly needed it. He should have simply tried to date her a different way. This had been the first thing that had occurred to him. It had seemed so right. Now it only seemed moronic. This wold never work.

So he must make the best of it. Keep calm and carry on, as the saying goes. That was a bit harder said than done...at least for Danny. Keeping calm was not his greatest forté. But he took a deep breath and tried his best to smile nicely. He hoped he could hold up on the air...

Then she said an odd thing...when he spoke about having sold some classical pieces...That’s very interesting, Erik. I’m sure that there’s a wide range of collectors for classical pieces, she said. He frowned again, taken aback a bit by her words. "Collectors? For classical compositions? Would they not wish to play them? I have sheet music made for piano and other instruments and there have even been a few CD's recorded by famous orchestras...so why would someone not want to listen to such lovely music rather than ...collect it? Where in a drawer? A piano bench? A dusty cupboard? Good lord, I should hope not!" Now he had become upset again. Keep calm...keep calm....keep calm.... he kept telling himself. He looked at Siobhan and tried to smile. "Sorry, just got a bit upset there. Think nothing of it. I'm fine. Completely calm."


I think I have more than enough for the interview to begin on the air...How about you? Are you ready to do this for real? Siobhan smiled nicely and Danny calmed down again, taking a deep breath. "Yes I'm ready. "

[SIOBHAN "NYX" SHAW]

Siobhan nearly smiled when Erik sounded outraged about classical compositions being collected. Clearly he had never met Jamie. He wanted everything, and never used anything.

"Collectors? For classical compositions? Would they not wish to play them? I have sheet music made for piano and other instruments and there have even been a few CD's recorded by famous orchestras...so why would someone not want to listen to such lovely music rather than ...collect it? Where in a drawer? A piano bench? A dusty cupboard? Good lord, I should hope not!"

Actually, he kept it all in an art folder in the guest bedroom with the intention of either playing it, selling it, or copywriting it for some radio or TV show he’d produce. It was one of the things she loved about him. He was a creative person who kept things everywhere for inspiration. It was where they differed. He wasn’t concerned with the clutter or the mess. She just didn’t need things to inspire her to do things, mainly because she wasn’t inspired to do much. She was the least creative person she’d ever met, and she was the least dependant on things. She didn’t need much, never had, and she wasn’t the kind who needed every surface covered. She’d had to de-clutter the apartment months after Jamie’d passed, most everything ended up in the spare room because she couldn’t bear to throw it out. She loved him, she loved his creativity, but she hated having so much just in the way, especially when it all seemed to scream his name.

"Sorry, just got a bit upset there. Think nothing of it. I'm fine. Completely calm."

Oh, she doubted that, but she appreciated his effort to keep things on the right track. Siobhan figured that was the best thing that she could do to keep him calm.

"Yes I'm ready."

“Excellent. Now, this room was recording during our talk. That’ll give me enough for a sound test and we can adjust for any natural whistling or pitch issues, even though you have a lovely voice,” she explained. “So, I’ll just be a moment listening to make sure everything’s ready to go. Then we can start the interview and talk to the lovely citizens of New York City.”

She smiled a bit, picking up her headphones and clicking a few things in the computer to play back what they’d just been talking about. However...that was when the strangest thing happened. She knew that voice. It was different when she was listening to it through the filters, the levels automatically adjusting to get rid of the din in the room and bring out his timbre. Danny from Manhattan. Everything suddenly clicked and Siobhan wasn’t quite sure she wanted to be in the same room as this man. She didn’t appreciate being deceived, even if it was just by using another name. He had dropped plenty of hints, what with the classical music and the like. Hector would probably chastise her for not paying attention, and she’d agree with him. This was a major slip.

Her eyes rose so that she could look at him and really take him in. She slowly put her headphones down and slowly rose to her feet, her eyebrows narrowing, her posture stiffening, and her hands planted on her desk where she could easily grab for something to throw at him.

“This interview’s over.”

[ERIK DANIEL LENOIR]

The interview was about to begin. Danny kept thinking about those millions of unseen listeners. What had he been thinking? This was worse than seeing to whom you are speaking. Who knows who these people were? What would they think of him? What if he started to stutter and get upset, which he thought was quite likely... Keep calm, keep calm, keep calm...he kept telling himself, while taking deep breaths. He would have walked out earlier, as soon as he realized she was not attracted to him, except that he had promised. And Danny kept his promises...well, as best he could keep them. Sometimes there were mitigating circumstances. But he would not take off on her.... and he would do his very best to keep his wits about him and answer her questions nicely and with every grace.

Siobhan told him that the previous had been recorded as they talked. He nodded. He had done quite well in some areas, at other times, not so well. But it hadn't been on the air. he put his hand on the table and drummed his fingers nervously but soundlessly. He could feel a bit of perspiration at the back of his neck and on his forehead. He reached for his handkerchief and dabbed at it. Siobhan complimented his voice. He smiled and nodded, "Thank you." That made Danny feel better. At least his voice would have a nice timbre on the air. Of course he had a beautiful singing voice, but he didn't know how his speaking voice would come across with the particular recording instruments in this studio. She explained she was listening to how he sounded so she could make minor adjustments.

Siobhan put the headphones and listened for just a bit. He had almost forgotten about the beautiful voice that she had, the thing that had lured him to the studio to speak to her. He watched her quietly, working on keeping calm. Suddenly he noticed a change in her demeanour. A look on her face perhaps, it started subtly, but it surprised him. Siobhan had not given any negative feelings all during the interview, at least that Danny noticed. In fact, even though he was uneasy about the unseen audience, she had tried her best to make him feel calm. But now he didn't like the look in her eyes. She stood, stiffening, and her eyes narrowed. Danny was quite caught off guard. In the merest instant of time, questions ran through his mind. Had he said something wrong? Had he offended her? He had said enough things that could offend her, but he thought she was not the type to become angry over someone's opinions. She had been very professional and let him speak his mind without letting her feelings show. But now this...

As she stood, she said, This interview's over. Danny sat for a moment in stunned silence. "What....what? Did I ...say ... ummm...something wrong?" He was stuttering and his hands began to shake. "Uh...I'm sorry...if I said...said...something...you didn't like...." He started to hyperventilate and suddenly he couldn't remember anything. He stood and the chair almost tipped over. He held on to the table for a minute, hoping he wouldn't pass out. It was likely her tone of voice and the suddenness of her ending of the interview that stunned him. He was starting to feel dizzy...which way was the door? He couldn't remember...

[SIOBHAN "NYX" SHAW]

Siobhan was expecting Danny to shrug and tell her the jig was up or to laugh at her for not figuring it out until right then. However, the stunned look on his face wasn’t one of the reactions that had occurred in her mind. Oh, she wasn’t happy, but considering she was Irish in heritage, she was quite restrained for what she could have been. Inside, she was furious with him, and fairly so. She’d been tricked. He hadn’t even had the decency to tell her that they had talked on the radio before. He hadn’t even told her that he went by Danny. Who knew if it was even part of his real name? She was just not happy, but she hadn’t yelled or thrown anything, even if he had reacted was as if she had. The way he was breaking down did need her attention. After all, she’d get the title of ‘Shock Jock’ if she were to have a guest die in the booth. That would be another knock to her reputation that she just didn’t need.

"What....what? Did I ...say ... ummm...something wrong? Uh...I'm sorry...if I said...said...something...you didn't like...."

She let out a long breath, something that seemed stark in contrast to Danny’s hyperventilation. It was meant to calm herself down and get a grasp on the situation, but it also served to be a partial sigh. Oh, how did she end up in this situation? Honestly, she was probably the only person alive who had these stories. Her stalkers were supposed to be filtered out. She wasn’t supposed to ever run into the people who she talked to. It was the beauty of anonymity. The ones she had met were harmless and hadn’t gone to such lengths to meet her, but she’d had a few others in the profession who had told her enough horror stories to be wary.

When Danny or Erik or whoever he was got to his feet, he grasped the table and looked like he was going to pass out. Siobhan really hoped he wouldn’t. Sure, she wasn’t happy, but she didn’t wish the guy any harm for what had happened. She wasn’t the kind of person who could watch someone else suffer for anything, let alone something as dumb as what had just happened.

“Hey, Danny. Calm down, you didn’t say anything I didn’t like. You didn’t say anything wrong, but you need to take a deep breath,” she advised in her more dulcet tone, hoping that it would help soothe him. “C’mon, sit down and take a sip from your water.”

Normally she would have rounded the booth and helped him sit, leading the glass to his lips and rubbing his arm, but she was still aware that he had tricked his way into the booth, so who was to say that this wasn’t another trick? She pressed the intercom on her desk and called for a medic, but she knew it would be a few minutes, seeing as how they ran on such a small crew after hours. For once she wished this had have been scheduled for nine AM. Then someone would have been around to handle all this.

“Deep breaths,” she advised, holding out a hand in a want to touch, but knowing not to. It would be playing into whatever this was. “You need to calm down.”

She felt like she was talking to herself here. He clearly wasn’t hearing her. She wasn’t even sure if he knew where he was right then.

[ERIK DANIEL LENOIR]

Danny was on the brink of passing out. When his anxiety became severe, he often started to hyperventilate. He could feel the tingling in his fingers and toes and the lightheadedness that brought. He sat down again in the chair. Siobhan told him to take a deep breath, which was exactly what he didn't need. He needed more carbon dioxide in his body, not more oxygen, at the moment. The two gases were not in balance and it could cause loss of consciousness. Luckily, Danny remembered what to do. To bring more CO2 back into his body, he needed to breathe how own CO2 back in until there was a balance. There was no paper bag in sight so he cupped his hands over his nose and mouth and breathed deeply. In a moment he felt less lightheaded, but still he was confused and upset that Siobhan had suddenly ended the interview.

She said he hadn't done anything wrong, so what was the reason for this abrupt ending? Once he felt a bit better, he ran his fingers through his strawberry blond curly hair and stood up again. He looked over at the place where he had laid his overcoat and his briefcase. He mumbled, "Sorry it didn't work out," and picked up his overcoat, first putting it over his arm and then he decided to put it on. He picked up the briefcase which was filled with his business cards and several copies of a three page description of his business and the services he provided, and some other papers referring to his business. He picked up the brief case by the wrong end and most of the material came falling out of it and scattered onto the floor.

Danny scrambled for it and picked it up again, replacing it in the briefcase. "So sorry," he mumbled again. Finally he was standing, briefcase and hat in hand, with his coat on. He nodded to Siobhan and smiled a nervous smile. He really wanted to ask what had gone wrong. It was very confusing, but he was feeling better and knew he needed to leave before he did or said something even more stupid, which he was wont to do when he was in his nervous state. He looked around and saw the door. He pointed to it, "Is that the way out?" He gave her another very nervous smile. "Well, it's been lovely," he said in a very quiet voice. It was not said in a sarcastic tone, he quite meant it had been lovely, up until the last few minutes where he had made an absolute fool of himself after her cryptic remark. His hands were still shaking, but he was much more clear-headed. He would go home and drown his disappointment at how the interview had ended and how his hopes for a date with her had been dashed, in some beautiful classical music. That was a calming thing for Danny. It took away the stress. He nodded as he put his hand on the door. "Goodbye, sweet Siobhan Shaw, you of the lovely voice..."

[SIOBHAN "NYX" SHAW]

"Sorry it didn't work out."

And Siobhan was, too. He hadn’t seemed like a bad guy, just shy and a little nervous, but there was definitely a line crossed here and she couldn’t allow that. It started with allowing a meeting and grew into the horror stories Jamie had drilled into her head. Still, she felt terrible when he dumped his brief case’s contents all over the floor. He scrambled to get everything picked up, mumbling his apologies. It really tugged at her heart strings, and if she hadn’t grown to be the woman she was, she would have apologised and sat him down, maybe offering him a coffee or dinner or something to make herself feel better for causing this. But she had to stand up for herself and he would either figure it out or he wouldn’t.

"Is that the way out?"

She watched as he pointed at the door, smiling and fidgeting nervously. She merely nodded, not sure she could trust herself to speak without an apology falling from her lips. If she apologised, she’d be pulled right back into whatever game this was. That was the worst part of all this. She had no idea what his game was. Why had he called and called, then showed up? Again, she wished she wasn’t in this position. It was awkward and she kept questioning herself. It was hard to stand there and not feel bad, even though she knew she’d done the right thing. If her Producer recognised his voice on the air, she’d have bigger problems.

"Well, it's been lovely. Goodbye, sweet Siobhan Shaw, you of the lovely voice..."

Now that she was listening to the way he talked, it was almost laughable that she hadn’t realised who he was sooner. It was one of those things that she should have caught onto much sooner, but there was no turning back time. What mattered now was how she handled things. And comments like that really got to her. The way he said it was too intimate for people who’d just met. It was almost reverent and wistful.

“Mr. Lenoir,” she sighed, leveling him with an even look. “Do you know why this was inappropriate?”

Perhaps he had no idea and did this all the time. She wasn’t sure if that was the case and wouldn’t imply anything along those lines, but he had to know that after the interactions they’d had on the air that coming into her space and not announcing that was not right. She felt completely duped, and no matter how sweet and soft spoken this man was, she just couldn’t forget that.

“Regardless, I’d like for you to leave your information with the front desk. We’ll still host your business’ information on our webpage,” she informed him. “We’ve agreed to feature you and I’m going to uphold that part of the bargain.”

It was the best she could do after all. Even she had people to answer to and this would be the one saving grace of the night.

[ERIK DANIEL LENOIR]

Mr. Lenoir, Do you know why this was inappropriate? Siobhan's question came as a surprise just when he was leaving. His hand had reached for the door, but he pulled it back slowly. He looked at her strangely.

"Inappropriate? I don't know what you mean." Danny truly didn't have any idea what he had said that was inappropriate. He shook his head. If there was only one inappropriate thing in all he'd said, he would like to know what it was.

Waiting for her answer, and already nervous, Danny tried to smile. But he wasn't stuttering any more and he had regained a little of his lost composure. "It was of course very lovely of you to allow me an interview. If I said something you didn't like, well then, I apologise. I expect I never should have thought this would come to a good end, considering that I really didn't need any free advertising." He stopped, realizing he probably had shoved his foot in his mouth again. Luckily he hadn't said anything about asking her for a date., which of course had been his main reason to try to see her in person. She was a very difficult person to see in person.

Now that he'd come to terms with it, and knew there would be no relationship with Siobhan, he was a little more confident. "You are a difficult lady to see in person...however, it was well worth it." He left it at that. Let her think whatever she wanted. This was the end. There was no more. His hand reached out for the door again.

[SIOBHAN "NYX" SHAW]

The strange look Siobhan got when she asked her question was about what she expected. If he didn’t know enough not to do it, she didn’t suppose that the answer would come to him as they were standing where they were in the room. She’d self-consciously put the desk between them, not knowing what to expect, but smart enough to expect it.

"It was of course very lovely of you to allow me an interview. If I said something you didn't like, well then, I apologise. I expect I never should have thought this would come to a good end, considering that I really didn't need any free advertising."

Siobhan raised an eyebrow, wondering if he was just messing with her at this point, or if he genuinely didn’t have a grasp on reality. She’d dealt with both types of people before, but she preferred neither. Both always left her feeling on edge. She didn’t have any idea how to handle this type of situation. All she knew was that she very much wanted this man gone so that she could get back to her day. The fact that he knew this wouldn’t end well and had put her through whatever this was anyway...she really didn’t know what to make of any of this.

"You are a difficult lady to see in person...however, it was well worth it."

She didn’t even know what to make of that. She was difficult? She’d heard that a few times throughout her career modelling. Even Jamie had called her difficult a few times, but always with the playful tone that let her know that there was no heat behind it. She was sure she’d start hearing it from Zander and Hector next, but she hoped not. Hearing it from Mr. Lenoir and knowing he meant it...

“Thanks?” she offered, wondering how someone was supposed to respond to that. "I don't know what to say here, Danny. Just...this can't happen again. Understood?"

She wished her voice was a bit firmer on the 'understood' part, but it was too late now. All she could do was hope that Danny was done with this. Done before anything else happened that they might both regret.

[ERIK DANIEL LENOIR]

It can't happen again... she said. What couldn't happen again? Another interview? Not likely that he would want one. Not telling her his complete name? She knew it now, so it couldn't be that. What was she talking about? Coming to the station? They wouldn't let him in, he was sure. There would be no point in doing that. "Mrs Shaw, what is it that you don't want to happen again?"

Danny just wished to leave the radio station. He had made a fool of himself and the worst part was, he wasn't sure exactly what had set Siobhan off. He hadn't even asked her for a date. But he didn't dare question her further. He shouldn't have even asked her what she meant about something not happening again. He was afraid of what the answer might be and that would undoubtedly set off his anxieties again.

He noticed that she was standing behind the desk as if for protection. She was afraid of him? What had he done to make her afraid? He didn't want to ask. And he probably shouldn't proffer his hand for a farewell handshake, then. He nodded, his briefcase in hand. "Thank you for everything," he said with a self-conscious smile. He let himself out of the office and was about to close the door when he thought of something. He pushed it open just enough to stick his head back in. Mrs Shaw, if I call you on the air, would you talk to me? And play something classical for me? You really have the sweetest voice." He didn't wait for an answer. He assumed it would be no. But there was no harm in asking. She already thought him an idiot.

He finally left the studio and with a nod to the receptionist, he walked to the door and left the radio station. He walked outside and looked back at the radio station building nostalgically, then turned on his heel and walked briskly home, looking like any other New Yorker in a hurry to get somewhere.

[SIOBHAN "NYX" SHAW]

"Mrs Shaw, what is it that you don't want to happen again?"

Siobhan couldn’t answer that. There were so many things. She didn’t like thinking the worst of people, but she was conditioned enough to know that there was something off about Danny or Erik or whomever he was. She couldn’t second guess herself, she couldn’t sit and wait for something to happen again, or to treat someone who seemed so decent so poorly. So she let him have the last word there and kept her silence.

“Mrs Shaw, if I call you on the air, would you talk to me? And play something classical for me? You really have the sweetest voice."

In the past, the answer would have been yes. She would have done that just because she was a decent person who really didn’t mind the switch ups to her schedule. Now...she just didn’t know. Meeting Danny had shifted her entire view on the world she existed in. Jamie had warned her that there were people who would take more interest in her than was proper. She’d avoided them, or they’d been kept away, and she didn’t quite know where she was supposed to go from here. There was an apology on the tip of her tongue, the want to please and get back to normal almost overpowering, but before she could say anything, Danny was already walking out the door.

Sitting back down at her station, Siobhan took a long moment to stare at Jamie’s picture on her desk.

“Well, I hope you’re happy,” she sighed.

Of course, there was no answer and she didn’t really expect one. Moving to the computer, she quickly pulled up an older show of hers, the recording stored in the station’s mainframe. It had been a show played in the height of summer when she doubted anyone was listening, so hopefully no one would be disappointed with the older content to it. Right then, she was a bit too shaken up to sit and host a show. Still, she was only a minute out before she was supposed to be filling the airwaves, and she had to do something. So, she pulled on her headphones and waited for the cue, switching on her microphone.

“Good evening, New York. Our guest for tonight, Mr. Erik Lenoir,” she paused taking a small breath. “Will not be joining us. We apologise to anyone who was looking to participate in tonight’s interview. However, his information is all listed on our webpage and we encourage all listeners with a question to contact Mr. Lenoir directly.”

Clicking on the show’s recording, she brought it up, hand poised to press play.

“In lieu of the interview, we will be replaying a previously aired show. I apologise again and hope that you all have a wonderful evening and enjoy the music.”

She couldn’t press play quickly enough, resting back against her chair and wondering what she was going to do with herself now. Reaching for her phone, she quickly dialed a familiar number.

“Zander? I think I need a drink.”