Post by kuku on Apr 7, 2010 3:52:32 GMT -5
Vivian closed her eyes and let out a long slow breath. She tugged at the neckline of her shirt and yanked her hair out of it's sleek up-do. Today was not the day for family events. Claustrophobia had worked it's claws into her and for once the girl who wanted nothing more than to be seen was looking to disappear. All she wanted to do was get herself good and lost in the crowd. Slowly, she began to walk, thinking carefully about each step, as if something dangerous was coming, or had maybe just passed. She really couldn't quite tell which one yet.
With a glance around, just to make sure she was away from it all, Vivian tried to figure out just what had went wrong. Nothing more than a run of the mill company lunch. Some important people to greet, make small talk with and then quickly pass on to someone more important...What was it then that had her running?Her mind was not quite ready to think clearly. Several deep breaths later, Vivian was clearing her mind. Colors and people passed by her, as if there was somewhere to be or something very important to do...Not today. She didn't care what it was that she was supposed to be doing, they wouldn't be able to make her. Not when she was here. There would always be something very surreal about Times Square to her. Nothing felt quite real. Could it be that she was so used to the bubble of society that the heart of New York was lost to her?
There were days when she worried about that. Vivian knew what she wanted, but she also worried about what completely surrendering to that world would mean. A part of her would always want to be in the middle of a busy street somewhere, being able to do exactly what she wanted. Most of the time she did anyways, but with her name and ambition there was something to be surrendered. Her life had a price to pay, and it may not have started out that way, but most of the time she was more than willing to pay it. After all it was much better to be where she was than where some people were. Maybe...From time to time she really did doubt that. Always having a spotlight of some sort shining down on you could be exhausting.
Too much thinking. What she wanted to do now was the opposite. If only her head knew how to shut up. All the thoughts buzzing around were doing her no favors and she was just thinking herself in circles. Vivian was in a very strange mood indeed. The only thing to do was walk, and try to tune out both the outside world and her own mind. Very slowly she lost track of where she was going, and who was around her. A little time away from the world would do her good.
With a glance around, just to make sure she was away from it all, Vivian tried to figure out just what had went wrong. Nothing more than a run of the mill company lunch. Some important people to greet, make small talk with and then quickly pass on to someone more important...What was it then that had her running?Her mind was not quite ready to think clearly. Several deep breaths later, Vivian was clearing her mind. Colors and people passed by her, as if there was somewhere to be or something very important to do...Not today. She didn't care what it was that she was supposed to be doing, they wouldn't be able to make her. Not when she was here. There would always be something very surreal about Times Square to her. Nothing felt quite real. Could it be that she was so used to the bubble of society that the heart of New York was lost to her?
There were days when she worried about that. Vivian knew what she wanted, but she also worried about what completely surrendering to that world would mean. A part of her would always want to be in the middle of a busy street somewhere, being able to do exactly what she wanted. Most of the time she did anyways, but with her name and ambition there was something to be surrendered. Her life had a price to pay, and it may not have started out that way, but most of the time she was more than willing to pay it. After all it was much better to be where she was than where some people were. Maybe...From time to time she really did doubt that. Always having a spotlight of some sort shining down on you could be exhausting.
Too much thinking. What she wanted to do now was the opposite. If only her head knew how to shut up. All the thoughts buzzing around were doing her no favors and she was just thinking herself in circles. Vivian was in a very strange mood indeed. The only thing to do was walk, and try to tune out both the outside world and her own mind. Very slowly she lost track of where she was going, and who was around her. A little time away from the world would do her good.
